I just got a new pair of slippers in December and I liked them. They were just fine, nice and fuzzy on the inside, black suede on the outside. Very cozy. I wore them last night to take the trash out to the curb. That's where my Christmas slippers met their demise.
My neighbor was doing the same. Her name is Julie. She got her trash to the curb and walked over to where I was placing mine on the curb and said hello. She thanked me for giving her grandchildren some hand-me-downs and she was commenting about how they loved the little girl clothes, especially the things I made. We were chit chatting like that and along comes my other neighbor from the house on the other side of me.
Jessica came out of her house with her two stupid dogs on a leash. She was obviously going to take them for an evening stroll. She was saying hello to me and Julie. The dogs lead her right up to me and Buddy put his front paws on my knee. I bent down to pat his head and nicely get him off my knee and then it happened.
Buddy peed on my feet.
With his paws up on my knee, his wiener was poised in just the right position to pee on my feet. That's just what he did. He let loose with his stream and it began on my feet and created a stream that ran down the edge of the driveway to the gutter.
Jessica said, "Oh, Buddy. I thought you were able to control yourself. Sorry!" She flashed a big smile and off she went on her walk.
Seriously? Did that just happen?
Julie was flabbergasted! Her jaw was nearly on the driveway. Good thing it was attached to her face or it would have fallen in the pee puddle. She was completely disgusted. I was too. I just got peed on by a dog! I've been peed on many many times, but never by a dog! So gross!
The pee didn't actually touch me because he peed on the top of my slippers. My feet were inside, but protected by the slipper upper. My bare ankles didn't feel a drop, so I think that I was spared any actual pee to skin contact. But, still, horribly disgusting!
I slid out of my slippers and stooped over and picked them up by the heels. I placed them right on top of the trash bin and walked inside barefooted. I didn't even say goodnight to the neighbors. I'm sure that type of event trumps any social graces and excuses all manners though.
I came in and washed my hands, then sat on the edge of the tub and scrubbed my feet from my toes to my knees. I woke up this morning and did it again. I was just feeling yucky from the idea of it!
I was able to sneak in a trip to Target today and I grabbed up a new pair of slippers. Look, they have no dog pee on them!
You're a magnet for animal defecation. Birds like you, too. Now dogs. Maybe you ought to avoid the zoo for awhile.
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